You know whom I’m talking about. Perhaps you have found yourself engaging in this person’s favorite game, yes, but. The rules of the game are that you are supposed to point out a long list of examples that disprove your friend’s doom and gloom outlook, and your friend is to contradict each of your points by saying, “Yes, but… ” and counter your points with more worry or unhappiness or inadequacy or lack or bad luck stories.

Where does this person’s unhappiness (inadequacy, lack, worry, etc) come from? Everyone who knows this person knows that it does not actually exist in the “real” world. The troubles only exist in his or her mind, in the point of view that (s)he chooses to hold, in the story (s)he tells him or herself about the world. We can see this person create increasing amounts of drama and difficulty.

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