Revision to attached paper.

Ensure that all of the instructor’s corrections are made from paper and below information:

Your introduction is noted- it focuses on a general overview of the topic, the controversy and opposing sides.  However, much of your content is not as effective as it could be if the wording were  clearer.  Most importantly the thesis must be clearly stated as the ending of the introduction. It is to include your argument and the reasons for it.  Next, the Review of Literature follows; your focus should be clearly on what the sources have to say on the pro and con sides of the argument.  It is about the source ideas that support the thesis and the source ideas that are on the opposition side.  So that each side is clear,  subtitles may help.  EXAMPLES: Ideas in Support of the Thesis  and   Ideas In Opposition to the thesis. This is the main reason for the review of what the references have to say.Also, your conclusion is off topic-The conclusion to the review should only note the key point of the pro and con sides and restates the thesis. The paper demonstrates acceptable use of Standard Written English with a punctuation and grammar errors, and unclear wording and sentence construction.   APA format errors are noted in references and in text citations. 

Make sure that thesis is stated in paper and not applied

Use APA 7 format

Add any information needed to make paper concise and clear.

Add any addition information that you feel is needed on the subject to make paper better.